One of the biggest copouts of modern time is the phrase “In Love.” For centuries romantic stories, biblical verses and epic plays have utilized the word “Love” to express ultimate commitment, sacrifice and adoration. Today, we throw around the term “Love” to describe almost anything; food, pets, items, idols, etc. With decades of loose usage, we have become a world sensitized to truth and articulations. Where once “To Love” was enough to carry a relationship through a lifetime, we now fragment and categorize “Love” into certain states and conditions, thus leading us into an age of romantic skepticism. The more a person uses “Love” to describe things in their life, the less meaningful it becomes to the person(s) around them. We then create phrases like “In Love” to help us define what we hope to find in our romantic life or, more dangerously, give us an easy out from the love we have already divulged.
I am going to put this right out there; you can’t be “In love” with someone. You either love them, or you don’t. Throughout one’s lifetime, it is possible to love more than once, but it is impossible to love simultaneously. You can’t state that you love both Bill and Tom, because “To Love” is to give everything of yourself and, trust me, you are not giving everything to both Bill and Tom. The phrase “In Love” scares me because it implies a love that has not yet cumulated itself, but for some reason in our modern society this phrase is valued more than love itself. “I am in love with you” is immature at its essence, describing all the positives a person reveals because time hasn’t uncovered the negatives. Yet it holds more clout than someone who gets tagged with “I love you.” You can’t be “In Love” with someone who you already love and you definitely can’t be “In Love” with someone if you love someone else. If you state you love someone, but are “In Love” with someone else, chances are you don’t love one of those people and it is up to you as a person to be honest with yourself when it comes to proclaiming who you love.
The easiest fix to this, is to modify your jargon. Try using words such as like, cool, awesome, nardly, spectacular, superb, and, my favorite, hic-a-doo-la. All these words can describe a person before you announce that you “Love” them. Let’s restore meaning to a word that once enacted plays, set men on great quests, and brought down cities and countries. I don’t think the pizza you eat at three in the morning can compare to such things, so rather than saying “You love this pizza,” try stating that “You like this pizza” or “This pizza is awesome.” The same can be said for relationships. Throw around “Like” instead of “Love” because in the end, when you do find someone worth loving, it is actually unique and not common tongue. To love is to give everything of yourself, unconditionally. Once that stops, then it is not love anymore. You cannot “Still Love” someone after the love is lost. To care is not love. There can be only one type of love in this world, one way to love in this world, multiple reasons to love in this world, but you can only give yourself to one person at a time in this world, debunking all conditions and states created for love; there is only love.