January 07, 2015 | | Comments 0


As 2014 comes to a close and we bid farewell to the year, many of us find ourselves reflecting on the past year and tallying up our wins and losses towards goals we had set forth to accomplish 12 months ago. Some of our unaccomplished goals will make our mental list of resolutions for 2015, while others will simply be forgotten, as they no longer hold the same importance as they once did.

It is this time of year when people are filled with remorse and/or hope. Some of those who feel they’re adrift in the world will set goals to accomplish in the new year in hopes to feel more settled and self-confident in 12 months time, while many people will vocalize dreams with no real plan of action or desire to put forth effort in making these dreams a reality. And there are those who simply believe this is just another day on the calendar and there is no need to review the past, or set expectations for the future.

While I have never been big on New Year’s Resolutions, I have been in a time of reflection for several months now and today my lamentations are at an all time high. Naturally, as I cogitate where a year ago I thought I’d be today, I note the different choices or paths I could have taken to ensure I’d reach my goals and I realize that my downfall is not planning for the curveballs life and people will throw at you and not knowing how I would handle those whammies. It is the combination of that knowledge and my Facebook newsfeed (which shames me at what has become the norm) that prompted me to enter the New Year with a plan in place.

I have huge expectations of myself for 2015 but with only two, simple steps to follow in order to accomplish them.

  1. Better handle my emotional hurts and scars and to dismiss the ones that I am able to.
  2. Above all things, to be kind.

Yes, I have specific financial, career, and personal goals for 2015, but the steps in accomplishing those are in the daily details. It is the two steps listed above, that will ensure my reflections in the upcoming year will be with pride and peace in my heart for the type of person and behavior I have displayed in this often times chaotic and cruel world.

It is my wish that these would be everyone’s resolutions for 2015. If we all did these two things, there would be less crime, cruelty, violence, cries for attention through social media, and frankly, the world would hold better people than it does today.

I’m going to be a better friend this year. I’m going to stop enabling the self-centered, self-exhibitionists, and “look at me” posts from my newsfeed and hug my friends and family and tell them that I do see them, the real version of them. I’m going to be kind.

I urge you all to scroll through your newsfeeds and look at how many of your friends are screaming for attention. Be it through a shameless nearly naked picture, narcissistic comments, check-ins at places they hope will make others jealous, public declarations of love to the person they live with (umm…why are you writing it on your wall rather turning to them and telling them face-to-face), postings to their children that can’t read and aren’t on Facebook in hopes that everyone see what a great parent they are, mean and hateful posts (about political parties, uniformed officers, or ex’s) and countless other posts that all cry “look at me, look at me”.  I recommend you do this, not to judge your friends but to notice how many of them are screaming for validation in the form of likes and comments. It’s sad. It’s depressing. It’s typical of the society we have created. Catherine Zinger says it perfectly: “A man’s true character is revealed by what he posts when he hopes everyone is watching.”

Take note and decide if you’re proud of your friends and/or yourself for participating in the outcries or even encouraging them with a thumbs up. Does looking at your newsfeed under this light make you want to make some resolutions too?



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