Some girls grow into boobs and beauty, but unfortunately, not maturity. To this I say: Grow up girls! You’re making us all look bad. Stop with the petty gossip, stop creating drama so that you feel like the center of attention, and get a hobby or a real job where you actually use your brain on a daily basis. Plotting revenge against someone who has wronged you in this daily soap opera you’ve been creating since high school is simply embarrassing. I can only equate it to Britney Spears shaving her head when the media wasn’t focused on her – not a good call, not a good look. Think of that the next time you want to make some passive aggressive post on Facebook or Twitter. Picture yourself with a shaved head and cut off shorts and decide if that’s the look you’re going for before you make another childish move in your ridiculous scheme.
If you’re unsure if you are one of these women who behaves like a little girl, ask yourself the following questions:
– Have I recently posted a photo on Facebook (or any other form of social media) where I’m wearing a bikini, lingerie, or other revealing ensemble because “I looked hot”?
– Have I recently been upset by a friend or acquaintance and, rather than calling that person to speak as adults and resolve a situation, called multiple other people to discuss the situation and ensure all mutual friends were on my side before contacting the person who upset me?
– Have I tried to view my ex’s current girlfriend or wife’s Facebook page?
– Have I shared with my friends the pictures I found on the internet of my ex’s current girlfriend or wife and made rude comments about her?
– Have I befriended former enemies because we both share a common enemy now? (Hint: if you weren’t friends in high school or college, but now are because the same boy hurt you both – the answer is yes!)
– Do I believe that being “hot” is the same as being “beautiful” or that being “hot” is better than being “beautiful”?
– Have I slept with a guy who made it clear he didn’t want a relationship, then called him names and cried because he wouldn’t commit to me after we had sex?
– Have I always relied on the financial help of my parents, boyfriend, or spouse and never been able to support my lifestyle without their help? This includes paying your own credit card bills, rent, buying your own clothes and meals, etc.
– When I go out with my girlfriends, do I speak louder and at an octave higher than my usual speaking voice?
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, if you have a picture of yourself seductively licking a lollipop, if you hold your phone out to take pictures of yourself (any picture of yourself) and then post them on Facebook, or if you own a pair of Juicy Couture sweatpants that read “Juicy” on the butt, then get offended when males make lewd comments to you when you wear them – It is now time you own up to the fact you behave as a girl, rather than the woman you should be. Similar to a man who earns his stripes, earn that cup size you paid for (padded bras included).
– Present yourself in a way that commands respect and shows intelligence and dignity. Everything from your actions to your clothing should warrant respect. You don’t have to dress like a nun to be respected, nor do you have to dress like a stripper to be considered sexy. Examples: Angelina Jolie, Reese Witherspoon, Victoria Beckham, Halle Berry. A good rule of thumb is bikinis belong at the pool or beach, lingerie belongs in the bedroom, and unless all of Facebook is accompanying you to either of these places, they don’t need to see your “hot” body in either of these items posted on your wall.
– If someone doesn’t appreciate your value, keep him or her at a distance rather trying to make them like you or get back at them for not liking you.
– Pay attention to your life. Have goals and objectives that are you own, not the goals of the person you’re dating. Allow your goals to evolve. Be more than you wanted to be in high school. Whether that’s being the CEO of a corporation, or the best mother you can possibly be – commit yourself to your goals.
– Be nice, compassionate, nurturing, and loving, but don’t confuse these with weakness. Realize that true beauty comes from within and childish and vindictive actions will make you look ugly no matter how pretty your face is or how large your chest is.
– Communicate like a woman. Speak clearly and concisely exuding confidence and intelligence. There’s no need to speak in high tones that make you sound as if you’ve inhaled some helium, or like a sex kitten from a 900 number, in order for you to be the center of attention. Real men would rather listen to an intelligent woman speak rather than an airhead giggle and squeak any day of the week.
– Establish and maintain boundaries for yourself and your friends. Hold yourself as accountable for your actions as you hold your friends for theirs. Own up to your mistakes and apologize for your side of the argument. Don’t expect your friends to forgive and move forward if you cannot.
– Take an honest look at yourself and your actions. If a relationship in your life is strained, be honest with yourself about what actions of yours contributed to the strain. Don’t expect your friends to be perfect when you are not.
Take the high road. If a relationship has to end, be it friend or lover, move forward with grace and respect. Spreading rumors, threatening a person’s reputation or livelihood, or repeatedly calling crying and attempting to guilt-trip the person are all forms of malicious and childish behavior. In the end, you’ll only be embarrassed for these actions when you finally do mature and start behaving like a modern, classy, sophisticated, and desired WOMAN.