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Real Pretty Pretty Weddings

March 23, 2010 | | Comments 2

prettyweddings

                        Have you ever wondered who/what is responsible for the almost 60 percent divorce rate we have here in America?  Well there is finally an answer; women.  This may offend some of you but here is my logic: For thousands of years, men have always fit the description of domineering, polygamous, assholes whose purpose was to conqueror earth.  Men, a thousand years ago, share the same traits, vices, and virtues as men in the present.  One hundred years ago, America’s divorce rate was a steady eight percent; Men were still assholes. Over the years it has steadily risen parallel with the digression of the traditional woman.  In the 1960’s, with the start of the feminist movement, America boasted a 25 percent divorce rate, a whopping 17 percent increase from just fifty years prior; Men were still assholes.  In the 1990’s, a decade where plastic surgery jumped to record levels for women, divorce rate in American was 40 percent, or a 15 percent increase from just thirty years prior; Men were still assholes.  In the year 2010, at the height of social networking, use of Internet applications, mobile technology, and the acceptance of the modern women in society, America’s divorce rate is now almost 60 percent; Men are still assholes.  We can look at hundreds of variables that correspond to the destruction of traditional women and relate them to the destruction of love and marriage.  However, there is one variable, before a marriage is even created, that has changed drastically in the last hundred years and mirrors America’s divorce rate differential. That variable is the average cost of weddings.   

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1910 Average Wedding Costs:

Church – Donation

Rings – $5-$20

Attire – $5-$30

Reception – $50

 Total – $100

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 2010 Average Wedding Costs:

Invitations – $400

Flowers – $1,500

Photography – $2,000

Wedding Favors – $400

Music – $1,000

Church – $500

Limousines – $600

Attendants Gifts – $500

Rings – $1,200

Engagement Ring – $5,000

Rehearsal Dinner – $1,000

Brides Wedding Dress – $2,000

Brides Veil – $200

Hair and Makeup – $500

Bridal Attendants Apparel – $800

Mother of the Bride’s Apparel – $300

Formalwear for Men – $1,000

Wedding Reception plus food and Liquor – $8,000

 Total – $26,180

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             Ok, enough of the numbers, statistics, and history lessons.  Ladies, when will you learn that it isn’t about the nicest gown, the coolest DJ, the best color combinations, or the biggest ring?  It isn’t about having a better ice sculpture than Angie, or better table cloths than Stacy, or making it look like your “Love” is more substantial because you have $4,000 worth of flower arrangements as opposed to $2,000.  A marriage is about the love of two people, not a year or more planning a circus performance so you can say your “wedding” was “X” times better than “Y” friend.  Because after it is all over, and you say your vows that bind you forever to another human being, there should be no turning back.  I have witnessed wedding fever trickle from girl to girl and when love takes a back seat to lavender, we should all take a step back and reevaluate the purpose of a wedding and marriage.  If you truly love someone enough to spend the rest of your life with them, you don’t need approval from Bed Bath and Beyond or Macy’s; you don’t need acceptance of distant family and acquaintances; you don’t need to waste time and money trying to make one day perfect.  Instead, you should be happy with the new life which you are about to begin and it shouldn’t cost you $30,000 to start it.  It is better to live your love, than try to show it through objects and expenses.  So stop looking for the pretty pretty for your wedding and just keep it real.

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