Girl Power vs. Guy Code

December 07, 2012 | | Comments 8

Girl Power vs. Guy Code: Why Females Always Lose

I just watched a commercial that stated various things women aren’t able to do, or are pre-disposed against “because I am a girl.”  The point of this commercial was to share how the world continues to be unfair to women by making education, promotions, etc., more readily available to the male gender.  I believe that certain areas of the world still have a long way to go in equality of the sexes and many religious groups as well.  Thus, I’ll speak only on the life I know in the United States of America and voice my opinion on why women are each others biggest obstacle in this great country in this day in age and why, if we could live by the rules of Guy Code and support each other, we would be far better as a sex.

The advantage is ours.  We outrank males on so many levels.  Women are the smarter gender: we invest better, we tolerate pain better, we interview better, we live longer and healthier lives, we are more recession proof, we are cleaner, and a recent study has even revealed that we are evolving more beautifully while men are staying the same.  To me this news is as nearly as exciting as pulling a pair of jeans out of the dryer and finding a five dollar bill in the pocket – talk about a score!  YES to finding money and YES to being female!  Unfortunately though, with all the things we excel in, there are a still few things men not only beat us in, but women will never be able to overcome.

The most obvious advantage men have is strength, however this really isn’t a problem as women, being the smarter sex can easily convince a man to move any heavy object when needed.  Let’s face it, even a smart man who knows he is being manipulated will allow this to happen if he enjoys any aspect of the female.  From looks to conversation, if a guy is intrigued, he most likely will willingly help the physically weaker sex out, if not because he is interested in the female, because his ego will kick in and he will assist with the heavy lifting simply because he is able and likes to prove it.  Easy!  The real advantage men have is GUY CODE.  Guy Code/Man Law/Bro Code/Man Etiquette is a universal, innate understanding, shared amongst men all over the world.  By the laws of Guy Code, men do not provide any information that could ever incriminate their male friends when questioned, they never betray their male friends, a wrestling match or rock-paper-scissors can truly be used to settle an argument without that argument resurfacing hours or days later, and most importantly, a guy will never go behind another guy’s back to his mother, girlfriend or wife, to talk about a problem he has with the other.  Ladies, here’s the kicker – guys never have to be told that these are the rules as they are born knowing them!  If we are truly the smarter gender and we aren’t born with Girl Code, yet still have understood that we’d need to create our own code, how in the world did we come up with Girl Power, rather Chick Code?  How have we not taught ourselves not to hate other women because of their size and shape, or to control our natural, jealous, envy-filled, “other-women-hating” instincts?

Here’s where we fail ladies: We, all of us, are jealous of other women and we let that jealousy get the best of us.

Of course there are some of you who will immediately deny the statement above and I can tell you honestly, you are only fooling yourself.  Even if you rarely get jealous, or behave in that irrational way that is known as “a typical female”, and even if you have many female friends and a strong base of male friends who tell you that you’re the most sane female they’ve ever met, you are still guilty of not having Chick Code.  In spite of your empowering Girl Power motto, revealing our strongest aspects, and proving that you get along with other women and have strong bonds with them, you have still been threatened by another woman at some point and done one of the following:

–          Called a woman who is clearly not overweight “fat” and “ugly” because she has somehow upset the balance of your fragile emotional self.

–          Gossiped with your friends about how another female received a promotion, was hired for a job, graduated early, affords things you cannot, is married while you are not, is more successful than you, is dating a guy you wish you were dating, is pregnant or has a family when you do not, or generally possess something you wish you had.

–          Passive-Aggressive Behavior – Posted confrontational or rude statements intended for another female to view on Facebook, Twitter, or other forms of social media, forgotten a females coffee order when you offered to pick up coffee for the group, or any otherwise expressive, aggressive behavior in a non-assertive, subtle way.

–          Intentionally undermined another woman’s self-confidence.

Quite frankly ladies, even those females I admire and love, are all guilty of this except for Mother Teresa and she was considered a “living saint.”  Do you personally know any females you consider a saint?  I didn’t think so.  Now before you female readers get mad and start calling me names and saying I’m the reason females are held back in this country, take a minute to remove your emotions, think about this logically, and keep reading.

It is our hotbed of insecurity issues that makes our estrogen-laced gender the weaker sex and why we, as intelligent females, need to throw away the days of Girl Power and adopt a more stable set of gender laws: Chick Code.  If we cannot learn to control our jealous and envious tendencies, and truly support other females in their achievements and found happiness, we will forever be the lesser gender.  It’s time we stand beside each other, not allowing pettiness to come between us.  It’s time we acknowledge our own insecurities and stop our passive-aggressive social-network name calling posts.  It’s time we stop incriminating our own sex, stop calling a foul when someone legitimately out plays us, and learn from their moves, rather than trying to belittle them.

If we aren’t going to challenge our female friends to an arm-wrestling match to settle our differences, then we need to accept defeat when a female ‘levels up.’  If we cannot easily move forward, we need to invent our own pissing-match tiebreaking method.  I personally suggest a kicking contest because I’m good at it, but I’m game for whatever you ladies prefer.  I’m a winner and I keep proving that each time life knocks me down and I not only get back up, but also rise above my previous status.  I’ll accept any challenge presented, but I’d like to rise to the top alongside other great females.  It’s possible ladies – look at the US Women’s National Soccer and Volleyball Teams and The Radio City Rockettes.  If these groups of women can complete their seasons as a team and be successful, so can we.

Girl Power has proven to be ineffective. I’m offering up a new strategy called Chick Code.  Who’s in?



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  1. chrisatrice69 says:

    Girls are recession proof? We can take that so many ways lol.

    The biggest problem with women in reference to camaraderie is that they feel like every situation is endgame and a single moment will effect their entire path of life. Men think of their life from its entirety, always pushing forward whether it is about love, occupation, etc.

    Every woman wants to be unique and most women think they are one of a kind. which makes them all the same.

    Every man wants to be apart of a team/brotherhood, and most men do what it takes to find/keep/ those brotherhoods.

  2. Mike says:

    Here’s where women fail. They assume they understand Guy Code. They figure it’s as easy as comraderie. Women will try it but inevitably quibble. But here is where women have an opportunity to move forward. In today’s world, men have become emasculated and succumb to this notion of doing whatever they’re told. It’s an extension of the manipulation by women to get men to do what they want via sex. Some weak men have taken that further to be more like a puppy/girlfriend such that the guy code means nothing. Now, we use “guy code” but what we really mean is a bonded friendship. Some men will do anything to get/keep their woman, even selling out the other people around them. This is less a failure of guy code and more a failure of personal values, common sense, and rational thought (e.g. A guy says to his buddy “hey i need to talk to you but please don’t tell ANYONE” and the first thing they do is tell their woman, knowing full well the ability of their woman to tell every person she sees; A man will stand with his wife and hang out with people he never would under normal circumstances and may even sellout his own family, just to keep his wife happy – Read: keep her from bitching). These men who can never take a stand on important issues, will forever be weak.

  3. Mike, I disagree with you on the “sellout his own family, just to keep his wife happy” comment. Once a man marries, his wife is his most important family and vice versa. That situation doesn’t play into Guy or Girl Code. A real man will defend his immediate family and protect his wife and their children (feelings included) because he knows that doing anything other would be the true sellout.

    Now, on the other hand, running back and forth between friends to your significant other is ridiculous and frankly, gossip isn’t becoming to either sex.

    The point of my article is that women need to stop competing against each other and support success of the same gender. We need to put aside our petty, passive aggressive social media fights and simply aggressive behind-the-back name calling when another female gets what we’d like to have. We need to recognize and support success within our sex and stop knocking other women down verbally.

    Siding with a spouse however, unless it’s criminal, is part of that whole marriage agreement. Its not in the fine print, but an implied contract.

  4. Ileana says:

    What a good article. Women are each other’s worst enemies because women have huge insecurity issues, even the prettiest, smartest, most together women. But men, in generally, have huge inflated egos that most times don’t match up with what attributes or successes they have. But being jealous over someone else’s success is typical of insecure women who group in cliques to feel secure. Secure women don’t need drones of bobble heads agreeing with their every thought to feel confident about their ideas or actions. I guess it depends on the woman. I’ve worked with men and women, and can easily say that women are too much to deal with in a work environment as a whole… they lack the compartmentalization that men do to do their job effectively and objectively without putting personal differences in their own way. I don’t gossip at work and I don’t stand around talking about my kids or my man problems. This is why I get twice as much done in half the time and this is why women like me are labeled names by other women who don’t understand that some women think like men.
    As far as Guy Code, women don’t lack it, people lack it. There are plenty of men who get intimidated by other men and immediately start trying to bring them down a notch with typical jealous comments: “he does steroids to be that fit,” “he must have a lot of money to get that girl” etc. Or plenty of men who will try to hit on women they know are taken…

  5. mike says:

    Laura, you don’t just blindly agree with your spouse because they’re your spouse. Have their back? Yes. But wrong is wrong no matter who says it. And to watch a wife forcibly put struggle between a man and his family only for her own wants OS just as bad as anyone else doing and is deplorable, as a spouse. That shows a lack of respect and love for your spouse and puts selfishness, and often insecurity, at the forefront. As Ileana stated, its usually that insecurity that is the problem and its a perpetuating feedback cycle that continues on. That’s where people, and many women, fail.

  6. mike says:

    That’s exactly right. This is less an issue of what guys do right and what women do wrong, and more an issue of people who lack honor, comraderie, and the value of brotherhood.

  7. Ileana – I agree with your work comment. I, too, keep my personal life compartmentalized and focus on the job while I’m there. Work has my undivided attention when I am there, so that when I’m home, my friends, family, and loved ones get my undivided attention as well. This is something many women aren’t able to do because they are controlled by their emotions. Great points!

  8. Mike, to clarify, I don’t believe in standing blindly behind your spouse. What I do believe is you don’t make any disagreements with your spouse public and you settle your differences at home (united) before you address concerns with friends and extended family. Agreeing with others publicly before speaking with a spouse and resolving issues will generally lead to increased insecurity issues. Spouses/partners need to know that you’re always in their corner, even if being in their corner is disagreeing with them for their own good, at least they know that they were cared about enough to have the discussion prioritized and held privately.
    As for women who put struggle between the man and his family for their own wants, those women are an entirely different article (so are the men who marry them.)

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